selfishness

What I Wish You Knew . . .

I wish you knew We’re selfish. By nature. We don’t understand when others get things we don’t. We don't know why everything can't be fair. And in the classroom, sometimes, I hear a lot of complaining about that. But I am your teacher, and I wish you knew . . .

  • That student left class early because they are on the way to a meeting with their oncologist to discuss new treatment options.
  • I know who is cheating.  I know how too.  But I also know you will learn a valuable lesson on test day when you can’t cheat and you still have to be able to answer the question. Or, you won't learn that lesson at all and get what you deserve.
  • I accepted that student’s homework late because her child has been at Children’s for the last week and a half.
  • I ignored that student’s question because I know she missed what I said the last ten minutes of class because she was playing on her phone.
  • Your classmate gets to borrow my book because although she bought one she can no longer access it.  Why? Because she had to flee an abusive relationship and left all her possessions in the process.
  • That student who seems to be understanding everything in class has spent three hours in my office this week.
  • That student wears long sleeves in class because he has had so much blood work this month he looks like an addict.  And they still don’t know what is making him sick.  Please don’t bother him about his clothing choice.
  • The reason your classmate cried when they got their paper back is it was their first time taking a test with new accommodations and they just made their first C (their highest grade) on a math test ever.
  • That student sleeps in class sometimes because he just finished working four twelve hour shifts.
  • I really don’t know where that student in your class went.  They haven’t responded to any of my attempts to contact them and I am very worried.
  • I take my job seriously.  I chose this job.  Most week’s I cry more tears for you than my own children.
  • You’ll never know the sacrifices my family makes for me to be here.
  • You’ll never know what the person beside you is going through.

Maybe that’s a good thing?  I want you to learn to be sympathetic to others without having to know how hard it is for them.  I want you to get to spend your time here without the worries they have.  I want you to know I understand you have bad days too.  Because one day you are going to face the tough stuff.  One day you will understand the struggles of #adulting aren’t wearing pants and paying for your own cell phone. #adulting is having a clear vision of the big picture (the good, the bad, the ugly) and still getting up and putting your pants on.  It’s admitting you can’t do it on your own and submitting every day to the One Who Can.  Oh and it’s praying.  It’s a LOT of praying.

September 3 - Command Love

John 15:12-17

These things I command you, so that you will love one another. (John 15:17 ESV)

When I think of love I think of something that is voluntary. It is something that you decide, not something that is forced on you. And that is exactly how God created mankind.

We were created with the capacity to love, but not forced to do so. No one makes us love anyone. But we do love don't we? We choose over and over again to risk our hearts in loving other fallen creatures like ourselves.

Jesus epitomizes love. He even at one point stated it matter-of-factly, the highest form of love is self-sacrifice. And he called his followers to join him in that. Self-sacrifice doesn't always mean voluntarily allowing your mortal existence to end so that someone's life can be better. In fact, some of the highest form of selflessness comes when you soldier in through something immensely difficult in order to help someone. That is love.

Those who profess to follow Jesus in their faith, beliefs, and practices are asked to be willing to serve one another selflessly. Jesus wants us to go the extra mile for each other. He wants to love one another deeply, and authentically. Love is voluntary, and yet the Christ of Christianity commands love.

July 10 - I Have Kept

Matthew 19:16-22

Jesus said to him, "If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me." (Matthew 19:21 ESV)

I am pretty convinced that most of us have a fairly selfish streak that runs right through the middle of who we are. It affects our thoughts, behaviors, and attitudes. It often keeps us from stepping fully into the kind of richly selfless life that Jesus is calling us to live.

That was the experience that the man often called the Rich Young Ruler had with Christ. He was devout. He was dutiful. He was prosperous. But when Christ called him to enter into a new kind of selfless living and thinking, the young man balked at the prospect of losing all that he had. In his words he had kept all of the laws and rules of God, but in his failing to obediently give all that he had away he missed the point of following Jesus.

Today, just like during Jesus' days of public ministry, it is really easy to allow dogmatic religious observance to cloud authentic Christian caring. Jesus didn't want the young man to give all of his stuff away because he wanted the guy to be poor. He wanted the rich young guy to extravagantly give away his many possessions because they had become more important to him than obedience to God.

There are still days, even after all my years in ministry, when I need to take a good look at my self. I have to ask myself if I have done more than keep the moralistic rules that I know to follow. Yes, Jesus sets out a guideline for behavior through his teachings, but often it is all about giving it all away.