I stood on the edge in the hot summer sun. The water I was covered in gathered around my hands which gripped the rails behind me ever so tightly. The rest dripped fifteen or so feet to splash into the pool below. My breath seemed to have stopped. Time too as my friends and family below looked on.
“Jump!” Someone shouted. I did. Gravity reached up and plucked my ten-year-old frame from the sky, jerking me into the waters below at a speed alien to me. SPLASH!
I found my footing at the bottom of the pool, kicked to the surface, and broke the bubbling surface with the ferocity of a lunging reptile to the cheers of everyone. Actually, I don’t think anyone cheered except my mom. Everyone else remarked on how long it took for me to stop peeing my pants and let go of the rail.
It wouldn’t be the last time I would jump. It wouldn’t be the highest thing I would jump from either. Nearly three decades later I’m still jumping.
These days the pool side balconies of my youth have been replaced by high dives and high cliffs. Gravity still plucks me from the sky. The water still whips into a frenetic froth upon entry. And the exclamations of my companions is a mixed bag of “attaboys” and indifference.
I’m ok with that. I don’t jump for them. I jump for me.
I’m not a daredevil. I never have been. I like to have fun, but my fun is usually of the measured and calculated variety.
I don’t jump to impress anyone. I don’t jump to feel like I’m flying. I jump because I’m afraid.
When I reach the top of some high place I have already decided I am going to jump, and so I do it. Not because I’m brave, but because I am not brave. I jump because I’ve made a promise with myself to never again let fear hijack my life.
I say “never again” because there have been plenty of times I did let fear hold me back. There are have been entire dreams remain dormant, unique opportunities pass by, and chances to make a difference spin away—all because of fear. There have been plenty of times in my life I’ve let fear hijack my response. Now, I’m aiming for something different.
Whether its a leap from a ledge or a plunge of faith into some unknown tomorrow—fear doesn’t win. It doesn’t even get to get in the game. Life’s bold steps take bold trust in a good God that knows better than I do what the outcome will look like.
Don’t let your fear tie you down, hold you back, or keep you down. Climb. Dream. Scale. Jump. Make up your mind on the way to the top you will go for it with all of the boldness you can muster.