10 Thoughts on the Olympics

Life usually doesn’t fit into nice neat little lists, but that doesn’t keep me from trying. Welcome to my Tuesday 10, where I try to fit the messiness of life into a list of ten. I'm not a hater. I can appreciate the athleticism involved in reaching that level of competition in many of the events, but I really do not enjoy the Olympics. Here are ten thoughts I've had recently in regards to the 2012 Summer Olympics. And it's a day early, so I get a 1.34% gold medal for punctuality.

1. They are incredibly boring. It almost, almost, makes me wish golf was on, or NASCAR.

2. It never fails to astonish at how badly we like to make things seem far more important than they actually are.

3. Phelps should play Aquaman in the inevitable crappy Justice League movie.

4. Dress it up all you like. You can even call it a race if you want to, but walking is still walking.

5. I recently realized that I spend more time in the shower during a typical week than I do watching TV. Thank you Olympic Games for helping me remember why.

6. According to the research of some smart money crunchers, we will spend well over $55 billion on the Olympics this year.

7. My favorite thing about the Olympics has been Google's search engine logo.

8. Tape delay still exists? Some of this stuff was on YouTube before NBC aired it.

9. There is never, NEVER, an acceptable time to wear a speedo.

10. The Olympics would be far more interesting without the commentators. Since when did we need a talking head to tell us about how people swim and run?